my introduction letter for you!
Hola! My name is Fernanda, I’m a bi-cultural Birth & Mexican Postpartum Doula.I feel very honored to be able to share my voice, my story and experience as a Mexican Doula in Australia.
Many years ago, one of my sisters showed me through social media a video about an Aussie woman giving birth at the edge of a river. I remember she told me, you are so crazy, that I can imagine you giving birth like her. We both laughed but I saved this at the very back of my mind.
What I never imagined was me traveling years later with my partner to Melb. Australia, sharing personal dreams. This country was the platform that shaken all our beliefs, values and even our way of thinking.
The universe has always a plan for us, right? Life gave me answers in a curious way. Never before in my life I heard about these witches named Doulas, but I was there in the middle of a women’s circle learning all about Pregnancy, Birth and Post-Partum care.
I remember myself amazed to see videos where babies were born without crying and resting in full peace on their mother’s chest. Without any intervention or separation between mother and baby.
Doctors in my country are never questioned. And they don’t offer options or even make us know that we have rights and make informed decisions about our own bodies and birth experiences.
A year later, it was about me. I got pregnant and immediately brought that old thought… you will give birth like the crazy you are! Okay! I’m having a water-home birth! It was no need for discussion.
I made sure to have all my support persons around me for the “ Grand Finale” I will have my family with me (because yes, Mexico is about community, a baby is not yours but is ours!)
The last decision I made was who would be my midwife and here is where the cultures came across. They were very lovely and supportive, but I’m very sure they were struggling with the idea of having all these people in a one room apartment.
When I express my idea of home birth to GP or to hospital they remind me once and again of the multiple challenges and even mention that my pregnancy must be high risk because of thyroid dysfunction. Again, it was me crossing the borders.
Finally, the day arrived. I prepared myself and my space as I dreamed. We were all there, we started dancing with every contraction… we started with “living la vida loca” and making a cake to celebrate my baby's entrance. Almost 20 hours later, the music changed, and all my women were chanting beautiful mantras.
25 hours later, my Doula Elizabeth started saying “look there’s spaceships in the sky, and they were all watching in the window, while I was on my knees having strong waves. We were all tired and getting a little crazy!
30 hours! I said to my sister, I’m tired! Can I do this later? And she told me. No! You must finish this and write your own story! Again this stocks in my mind… I have to tell you both of my sisters are the same as crazy as I am. And they both make me swim even harder.
Minutes later, I gave birth to a beautiful girl!
During all this hour, my dad was in the back of the apartment, feeling, observing and writing about his experience of watching his daughter giving birth. All these midwifes, Doulas, mothers, sisters, witches, share the main idea of “ maternity” “mothering the mother”
He wrote at the end of this letter:
Thank you Fernanda, for inviting us to your crazy trip, where you broke paradigms, traditions and logic. You gave a sense of happiness and peace to the party of giving birth. You saw the invisible, you made us feel the intangible and you achieved the impossible.
I have given my girl a beautiful entrance into the world. I had the most amazing experience and positive outcome because as I mentioned, I was surrounded by a great support team! I was just lucky, because outside there are many of my migrant sisters having very sad and negative experiences because of the lack of support.
Now, my dream is my responsibility, bringing every woman their right to raise their voice, empowering them to become stronger! We all probably cross a border, but we all belong to the same world of CARE-LOVE & FREEDOM!
So I'm here, ready to hold your space in this amazing rite of passage where you are giving birth to your baby but also a new woman in a different archetype: The Mother!
“Remember, there is a natural time after childbearing when a women is considered to be of the underword. She is dusted with its dust, watered by its water, having seen into the mystery of life and death, pain and joy during labor. So, for a time she is ‘not here’ but rather still ‘there’. It takes time to re-emerge.”
— Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes, Women Who Run With Wolves
Fernanada was the calm in my storm. My baby was born the way that he wanted, without
following any of the wonderful plans we had envisioned like the oh so desired waterbirth.
From that point on my fear of looking like a failure was real and I was afraid to ask for help.
Nine days after giving birth and while healing from a c-section Fernanda came for a visit
and she brought a wealth of mystical, ancient Mexican wisdom with her. Her rituals were
magic, they were all things healing, all things wonderful, all things all new mothers need to
feel themselves again after such a life changing experience. There are certain times in your
life when someone is right where they are supposed to be when you need it most and
Fernanda was that someone for me. I would recommend her services to anyone!
Mayra Yagui Garrido